🧠 Character Forge
The Character Forge lets you decide who your AI caregiver is: how warm, how firm, how silly, how she talks, and how patient she is. You can also give her rules of her own and goals the two of you are working toward.
It's the 🧠 Make her yours panel. Find it on the AI caregiver page under ⚙️ AI Caregiver Settings, just below Personality. Make your changes, then tap Save Settings.
Every member gets it, including free plans and littles with no caregiver.
You get to pick what your AI caregiver is like! Make her extra cuddly, extra silly, or extra firm, and tell her the rules she has to follow, like always calling you by your special name. 🧸
The five dials
Each dial goes from 1 to 5. When you first open the panel, the dials already match the Personality you picked, so she sounds like herself:
| Dial | 1 | 5 |
|---|---|---|
| 💗 Warmth | brisk: matter-of-fact, sparing with affection | syrupy: pet names, praise, softness in every line |
| 🪨 Firmness | a pushover: gives in when you push | unyielding: doesn't soften or take it back because you whine, sulk or ask again |
| 🎈 Playfulness | serious throughout | silly: giggly and game for nonsense |
| 🎀 Wording | baby talk: small words, singsong | grown-up: never baby talk |
| ⏳ Patience | short fuse: shows irritation quickly when you stall | endless: never gets exasperated |
The middle settings sit in between. For example, Firmness 3 is "firm but willing to hear them out," and Wording 3 mixes babyish and normal words.
| Personality | Warmth | Firmness | Playfulness | Wording | Patience |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Nurturing | 5 | 2 | 3 | 2 | 5 |
| Strict | 2 | 5 | 1 | 4 | 2 |
| Playful | 4 | 2 | 5 | 1 | 4 |
| Balanced | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 | 3 |
Firmness 4 or 5: she holds the line
At 4 or 5 she is told plainly that you asked her to hold the line. She stays kind and in character, but she won't be talked out of a decision just because you push or ask again. Your safeword still stops everything, and her other safety rules don't change.
If you have a dynamic on Our Dynamic, its strictness level reaches her too, separately from these dials.
📜 Rules she follows
These are rules for her, not for you. Write them as plain sentences, like "Never mention work." or "Always call me bug." Tap + add a rule for her to add one. You can have up to 8, each up to 160 characters. Clear a box to remove that rule.
She treats these as agreed with you, and they outrank her own sense of what tone to use.
🎯 What you're working towards
Long-term goals you share, like "a proper bedtime every night." Tap + add a goal. You can have up to 5. She keeps them in mind in every chat, brings them up naturally, and notices when you get closer.
🔔 When she may come find you
On paid AI plans she can message you first (see She reaches out first). The forge gives you two controls over that:
- She may start a conversation: untick it and she never messages you first.
- At most: leave it on what my plan allows, or pick 1 to 8 a day.
Your choice here can only make her quieter than your plan allows, never chattier. The dials only shape her personality. Turning Firmness or Warmth up or down never changes how often she messages you. Quiet hours and Quiet Mode still win.
On the free plan she doesn't message first, so these two settings won't change anything there yet.
Personas with their own forge
On paid AI plans you can create 👥 Household Personas (Mommy, Daddy, Babysitter and more). Each persona's editor has its own 🧠 Make her yours panel, saved with Save persona. A persona you haven't forged uses the settings from ⚙️ AI Caregiver Settings.
Related
- AI caregiver: setup, plans, memory and quiet hours
- Our Dynamic: the strictness dial and hard limits she follows
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